[That's more than reasonable. Guzma has a long way to go to make up for all he's done, and he knows that. For all he might say he won't apologize, and seems endlessly stubborn in that regard, he's clearly seeking some form of redemption.
It's no quick process, and there's going to be many mistakes along the way. The main question, however, is whether or not he can pull through, and considering his track record, it only makes sense someone wouldn't hold their breath for it. Especially Nanu, seeing as he's a bit more familiar with the man than most. The burden of being Team Skull's neighbor.
Nanu's sarcastic quip didn't go unappreciated. They're markedly different as they come, yet they have their surprising similarities. Perhaps their relationship could have been a better one, had Guzma not gone down the path he did, but there's no changing the mistakes of the past. There's only living with them, and endeavoring to not repeat them.]
Tch...
[It's not much of a response to Nanu's initial reply. Guzma can feel his hackles starting to rise, but his emotional exhaustion keeps him in check. He doesn't like being called out on most things, but this is particularly sensitive. Being told he's capable, and being called out on the fact he's never wanted to try not to fight with people silences him a bit further. It's certainly true, and he knows it, but it doesn't change how he feels, or how he always reacts.
That mention of Hala settles him, however. Hala had been doing a lot with him, challenging him—with more than just Pokèmon battles. Slowly that old man's words had begun to worm their way into his mind, and little by little he was indeed improving. It was subtle, so subtle that Guzma hadn't fully realized how things have been changing for him.
The subtly also kept him saying a similar script, his mind still thinking himself far more simple than he actually is. His social Darwinism still a great part of his mindset towards the world. So when Nanu goes on to call him out on his unwillingness to appear weak, it really just seals his point. Nanu doesn't even have to ask if he's right, because he quite obviously is.
Guzma's mouth presses to a thin line as he looks at Nanu—it's a sidelong glance, not fully turning his head to look at him.]
You're not wrong, nah. But that's basic survival. The moment you show weakness is when you get your ass beat. I'm no fool, I ain't gonna be beaten down by nobody.
[In Guzma's mind it's destroy or be destroyed. It's how it's been for far too long. It's that mentality, that anger, and hostility that robbed him of the chance to be a captain; ultimately fueling his rage. His anger problems are a vicious cyclical nightmare that is never ending in its self-sustaining nature. It torments and blinds him to the reality of his actions; a dual-pronged self-sabotage that leaves him more damaged and unfulfilled, while leaving him to feel disenfranchised by everyone else.
Even now he struggles to fully realize what he's denied himself because of his own ego and self-destructive coping. Slowly Hala is helping him see the error of his ways, but over a decade of conditioning doesn't go away so easily.]
But that's life. You're either strong, or you're weak. If you're gonna be showin' everyone how weak you are, it ain't no one's fault but your own when you get smashed.
no subject
It's no quick process, and there's going to be many mistakes along the way. The main question, however, is whether or not he can pull through, and considering his track record, it only makes sense someone wouldn't hold their breath for it. Especially Nanu, seeing as he's a bit more familiar with the man than most. The burden of being Team Skull's neighbor.
Nanu's sarcastic quip didn't go unappreciated. They're markedly different as they come, yet they have their surprising similarities. Perhaps their relationship could have been a better one, had Guzma not gone down the path he did, but there's no changing the mistakes of the past. There's only living with them, and endeavoring to not repeat them.]
Tch...
[It's not much of a response to Nanu's initial reply. Guzma can feel his hackles starting to rise, but his emotional exhaustion keeps him in check. He doesn't like being called out on most things, but this is particularly sensitive. Being told he's capable, and being called out on the fact he's never wanted to try not to fight with people silences him a bit further. It's certainly true, and he knows it, but it doesn't change how he feels, or how he always reacts.
That mention of Hala settles him, however. Hala had been doing a lot with him, challenging him—with more than just Pokèmon battles. Slowly that old man's words had begun to worm their way into his mind, and little by little he was indeed improving. It was subtle, so subtle that Guzma hadn't fully realized how things have been changing for him.
The subtly also kept him saying a similar script, his mind still thinking himself far more simple than he actually is. His social Darwinism still a great part of his mindset towards the world. So when Nanu goes on to call him out on his unwillingness to appear weak, it really just seals his point. Nanu doesn't even have to ask if he's right, because he quite obviously is.
Guzma's mouth presses to a thin line as he looks at Nanu—it's a sidelong glance, not fully turning his head to look at him.]
You're not wrong, nah. But that's basic survival. The moment you show weakness is when you get your ass beat. I'm no fool, I ain't gonna be beaten down by nobody.
[In Guzma's mind it's destroy or be destroyed. It's how it's been for far too long. It's that mentality, that anger, and hostility that robbed him of the chance to be a captain; ultimately fueling his rage. His anger problems are a vicious cyclical nightmare that is never ending in its self-sustaining nature. It torments and blinds him to the reality of his actions; a dual-pronged self-sabotage that leaves him more damaged and unfulfilled, while leaving him to feel disenfranchised by everyone else.
Even now he struggles to fully realize what he's denied himself because of his own ego and self-destructive coping. Slowly Hala is helping him see the error of his ways, but over a decade of conditioning doesn't go away so easily.]
But that's life. You're either strong, or you're weak. If you're gonna be showin' everyone how weak you are, it ain't no one's fault but your own when you get smashed.