[ She's not sure what to expect. She doesn't think she's worth that much to anyone other than him, really, and that Guzma is willing to push past that... well, even if he doesn't treat Chris the same way she does it's easily forgiven. It's... special. Important, still.
The hug is a surprise more than anything else and she lets him do it, lets him take control this time. She thinks maybe he needs -- deserves -- that for once. Hardly limp against him, she still responds in kind to let him know that it's reciprocated, that he has a place with her, whatever that might be. Convoluted and uncertain and messy, but she thinks that fits the two of them. Anything but normal. ]
Well, yeah. You were entitled to, you know. Don't act like it's deserving of an apology or anything. [ Forlorn and not untrue, even if he's lying she can tell there's some truth to it. At least maybe the working up and trying to work out. She can tell it must still sting but that's just how it is. It still stings her, too, even though she wasn't the one rejected. ] ...it doesn't matter. This is what happened and we were prepared for it. Just... I never thought he'd hold onto me so tightly. And I'm grateful for that, as... as upset as it makes me. I wouldn't have known freedom again if it weren't for him. I could've killed him, but he still... he still tried.
[ Wake up, Jill Valentine! Her name said countless, pained times. His voice wrought with something harsh and hurt and so different from his appearance. Much like Jill, he appears one way and sounds and acts another. He looks like a damned brick wall, but he seems to crumble before her, let her take as many swipes and hits as she likes no matter how devastating they may be. But he still calls her name and eventually holds her like she's the most precious thing to him. More than just a person to save, more than a friend or ally. He's delicate and warm; tentative in a way that speaks intimacy and an unspoken affection. His eyes are like Jill's, aching and withholding yet showing all the words he can't seem to make himself say. ]
That... I'm not against it. I don't... I don't not. I just am happier when the people I love. [ Love. ] Are in a place that makes them more comfortable. The past four years... it was all my own thoughts, that's all I had to keep me sane. It didn't bring me any closer to realizing how I wanted things to be or what would make me happy. All I know is that moments like this are important and that I'm happy to be where I am. I'm happy as things are. I don't... I don't need anything else.
[ It isn't a lie, but it lingers. Like she might have some idea what all of it means. In the end she clearly cares for Chris in a way that's unspoken with a depth beyond description. A depth she struggles to pull up, to admit to.
Lowly, quietly. To herself because she's not sure it will help him in any way. It's selfish.]
oh gimme them dokis uwu
The hug is a surprise more than anything else and she lets him do it, lets him take control this time. She thinks maybe he needs -- deserves -- that for once. Hardly limp against him, she still responds in kind to let him know that it's reciprocated, that he has a place with her, whatever that might be. Convoluted and uncertain and messy, but she thinks that fits the two of them. Anything but normal. ]
Well, yeah. You were entitled to, you know. Don't act like it's deserving of an apology or anything. [ Forlorn and not untrue, even if he's lying she can tell there's some truth to it. At least maybe the working up and trying to work out. She can tell it must still sting but that's just how it is. It still stings her, too, even though she wasn't the one rejected. ] ...it doesn't matter. This is what happened and we were prepared for it. Just... I never thought he'd hold onto me so tightly. And I'm grateful for that, as... as upset as it makes me. I wouldn't have known freedom again if it weren't for him. I could've killed him, but he still... he still tried.
[ Wake up, Jill Valentine! Her name said countless, pained times. His voice wrought with something harsh and hurt and so different from his appearance. Much like Jill, he appears one way and sounds and acts another. He looks like a damned brick wall, but he seems to crumble before her, let her take as many swipes and hits as she likes no matter how devastating they may be. But he still calls her name and eventually holds her like she's the most precious thing to him. More than just a person to save, more than a friend or ally. He's delicate and warm; tentative in a way that speaks intimacy and an unspoken affection. His eyes are like Jill's, aching and withholding yet showing all the words he can't seem to make himself say. ]
That... I'm not against it. I don't... I don't not. I just am happier when the people I love. [ Love. ] Are in a place that makes them more comfortable. The past four years... it was all my own thoughts, that's all I had to keep me sane. It didn't bring me any closer to realizing how I wanted things to be or what would make me happy. All I know is that moments like this are important and that I'm happy to be where I am. I'm happy as things are. I don't... I don't need anything else.
[ It isn't a lie, but it lingers. Like she might have some idea what all of it means. In the end she clearly cares for Chris in a way that's unspoken with a depth beyond description. A depth she struggles to pull up, to admit to.
Lowly, quietly. To herself because she's not sure it will help him in any way. It's selfish.]
Another time and another place, maybe.